As a medium and as a person I am met with quite a lot of success. The problem is that when you are successful you easily forget about the word failure.
There have been many times where I have failed and it can be devastating; it can hurt like hell! Why? Well, the problem with a lot of success is that you actually begin to believe that it will always be there. It is like with people who gamble and hit a winning streak – as soon as they lose they cannot let it go and they cannot understand why. Why do we not tell ourselves the truth when something does not function for us anymore? What is it that we are ignoring?
I think that failure and success must go together; one balances out the other. We need both to give us information. In not accepting failure I would not know where the lines are. When I meet with failure it gives me an important message: What do I need to change? What do I need to learn? Can I improve something? Another reason for failure can be that we are trying to achieve the expectations of others.
At times, whether working with TV or demonstrations, everything can seem to be going very well. On other occasions, demonstrations do not work out in the way that I expected or hoped for. When that happens it can awaken me to my own complacency, taking things for granted. So when complacency creeps in and I am met with failure it awakens me. Did I work hard enough? Was my ego in control? Do I need more knowledge?
Everybody has to have expectations, something to aim for in order to achieve success, but when we meet with failure or disappointment we can become extremely disgruntled. I realise that I need to fail, because it enables me to broaden my horizons. There is a thin line between success and failure.
Sometimes, what I expect to achieve is bigger than the potential I have. That is when I need to go back to the level where I can achieve. So, failure for me is a reminder and can ground me. Success is nice, but it can almost be addictive.
I remember a very good handball player who once said: “I never remember the successes, I always remember the times when I failed to put that ball into the net.” A lawyer I know who has vast experience and has been very successful in the courtroom said almost the same thing: “When I am successful and win a case the feeling just stays with me for a short while. However, when I have failed to win, that can stay with me for quite some time.” Why is it like that? It remains with us, because there is something that we have to learn from it.
I am glad that I do not always succeed in everything, because it brings me back into balance.
/Terry Evans
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So true..!
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Hi Marianne and welcome to the blog! Thank you for your comment! /Terry Evans